I get money from advertisers. That’s how I feed myself and my wife. It’s scary. Especially when I lose an advertiser. Especially when tax season comes around and I have a big chunk of money to pay out of pocket.
I’ve been freaking out a bit lately. I’ve been trying to sell a house that’s draining my pockets. I’m at a lull when advertisers pay their tabs. And I see my checking account counting down to doomsday.
I’ll probably be fine. But that doesn’t mean I’m not freaking out.
I’m tempted to quit what I’m doing and get a job. I could easily give up on this dream God’s given me and opt for the safety of a nine to five. But I’m choosing to trust God.
The crazy thing about trusting God with your dreams is that it seems like a passive action. But me and my family (they’re going through some roughness right now) are all finding out that this trust thing is a very active thing. Frankly, it feels more like running a marathon than resting in loving arms. It’s difficult. It’s painful.
But it’s such a sweet place to be. There’s so much beauty in the struggle.
True, I can’t really see the beauty right now. But I know it’s there. And I’m choosing to press on and trust God with my dream in spite of my feelings.
Maybe this blog is simply therapy for me. But I get the feeling God’s speaking to you through me. You have an opportunity to trust God with your dreams. You have the opportunity to be very active by placing it in His hands.
I want to encourage you. Do it. Go for it. Put your all into your trust in God. It’s a very beautiful thing, even though it may not feel like it.