My 13 year old sister-in-law is visiting my wife and me for the summer. To avoid a whole week of her watching TV while we’re at work, we signed her up for a summer gymnastics camp.
She went the first day. And it turned out, it wasn’t exactly age appropriate. She spent about an hour doing any physical activity, and the other seven watching kiddy movies and coloring. Not exactly what we were hoping for when we dropped our money on the thing.
So I went in to the gym the next day to see what we could do. I didn’t expect a full refund—perhaps prorated. But as soon as the conversation started with the owner, she became very defensive.
“I’ll have to look into that for you. I can’t tell you anything right now,” she replied—rushed and agitated.
“Okay cool. Do you know when you might be able to give me an answer? I’m trying to decide if I need to leave her here (if we don’t get the refund), or if I can take her home and expect to get my money back.”
“I already told you. I can’t answer you. And I don’t know when I will be able to answer you.” The conversation continued. Eventually it devolved into, “I’ve already rendered services. I’m a busy owner with the right to remove you from my premises. I’ve already answered you…”
Much yelling ensued as I tried to gently reply and pacify the situation (while still standing my ground to get what I was asking for).
I eventually left. The conversation was going nowhere. There was no rationality. No chance for resolution.
That lady has a problem. She thinks the world is against her. And I’d wager to believe the world is against her because she responds to the world like that.
If you assume everyone is out to get you, the world will probably get you.
I’ve found people are generally reasonable if you just take the time to listen. If you approach with kindness. If you approach with patience. But if you don’t, you’ll reap nothing good in return. And I imagine this girl will be reaping for years to come.
Don’t be like this girl. Don’t assume the world is out to get you. It’s not.