My book releases in less than a month. There’s nothing I can do about that timeline. On September 1st, it’ll be out in the real world where people are free to love it or hate it.
I find I’m in this weird nervous position. I’m terrified that nobody will buy my book. I mean, sure, a few people will buy my book. My parents, a few friends, and a couple devoted fans of ChurchStageDesignIdeas.com. But will anyone else pick this thing up?
I know it probably won’t be a NY Times Bestseller. I’m realistic. But what if, far missing that mark, it only sells 200 copies. In the publishing world, that’s a complete flop. I’ll probably never get another book deal again. (Not sure this is true…But it’s what’s going on in my head. So just go with me.)
And that brings me to a weird thing about self-confidence. Nobody can give you self-confidence. You know; Moody Publishers believes in this book. They saw the finished product and they essentially bought it from me. They agreed to partner with me to get it out to people. My editors have believed in this book. My wife believes in me. Countless others.
It doesn’t matter how confident others are of me…It doesn’t help me become confident about myself. Nobody can give me confidence. I have to find a place inside myself where I’m okay with whatever happens. I need to find a place where my identity isn’t wrapped up in how this book performs.
So how am I dealing with the fear? How am I gaining self-confidence when I’m terrified nobody will actually buy the book? I’m just releasing it. I’m letting God take control of the situation. I’m realizing it doesn’t matter if nobody buys my book…I still have worth.
