It’s scary to be open and honest with people. I don’t know about you, but there are times I’m tempted to hold back the real me. I feel the pull to project the “perfect” version of myself on social media or when I meet someone new.
But I’m convinced being transparent is one of the best things in life. Maybe not with everyone—some people aren’t trustworthy with the real you—but I’m convinced we all need at least a few people in our lives to whom we can fully reveal our true selves. Here’s why.
It helps you shoulder the burden.
Being transparent with someone is like handing them a vial of poison designed just for you. It’s toxic stuff that has the potential to harm. And when you’re transparent, you’re trusting they won’t use that to hurt you. It’s a real risk.
But at the same time, they can help keep it away from you. They can help carry the burden of such a heavy thing. And that’s something we need in our lives.
It helps heal other people.
When we continually hide our true selves, we become completely internal. We don’t give out because we’re afraid to.
But when you become transparent, you actually help heal other people. You give them your honesty and that gives them life. They can see that they aren’t alone in their struggle. They can see you aren’t the perfect person they assumed you are. (And that’s the default: We assume everyone has it figured out, even when they don’t.)
It shows you that you aren’t alone.
It heals others, but it also heals you. You aren’t the only one with struggles. With baggage. And as long as you think you are the only one, you’re going to let that stuff dominate your life. But by releasing it you can experience healing.
It shows you you have value in spite of your flaws.
Finally, the greatest thing about transparency is the acceptance you’ll experience in return. You’ll find out that you have value even if you aren’t perfect. There are people who will still love you even when they know the ugly truth about who you really are.
I’m not saying you need to tell your deepest darkest secrets to random strangers. But if you haven’t found a few people you can trust with your true you, you need to find them. Even if you’ve been burned in the past, the benefits of transparency far outweigh the risk of it happening again.
So your turn: Have you been burned in the past from being transparent? What steps are you taking to become more open and honest with the people around you?