My job lately has become a task of asking many people for tons of help. All of my Sunday| Mag writers are volunteers. Same with my graphic designers and copy editors. Then I’ve begun asking for help with my other sites too.
My to-do list is filled with items like “Ask ____ for _____” and “Remind _____ about helping with _____”. I do a lot of asking. And consequently I hear many no’s.
But I’ve made it my goal lately to make it easy for people to say no. With every email I send I make it clear that there will be no hard feelings. I’m grateful with every response that they even considered helping. I even lavish smiley face emoticons on my askees. I do this because I’ve changed my perspective on asking for help.
When I ask others for help, I provide them an opportunity. It’s not so much about helping me anymore. They have an opportunity to be part of a team. They can join me in creating something bigger than both of us.
I don’t do much that I couldn’t accomplish on my own. If all of my volunteers quit tomorrow, I could probably get by. The quality wouldn’t be nearly as good and the projects would suffer for it. But I could write, design, and edit on my own.
But the opportunity as others join me in this project is that it becomes bigger than both of us could do on our own.
So I don’t have to freak out when people say no. It was an opportunity I made available. They aren’t saying no to me. They’re saying no to the opportunity.
And the quicker they say no, the easier it is for me to offer the opportunity to someone else.
When I make it easy for people to say no, I get quicker responses and I don’t get the “avoiding my calls” situations. They don’t have to feel guilty when they see me. They don’t dread each time they see an email from me. And when they can finally say yes, it makes them excited.
And all of this is because I’m willing to hear the word no. I welcome it.
